But of course it wasn't my gone arm, or the... But of course it wasn't my gone arm, or the hand
which had once lived at the end of it, that was
the problem; the problem was the woman-thing in
873
the red robe, using me like some kind of fucked-up
Ouija board
"What?" Wireman asked"Don't keep us in suspense,
muchacho, what?"
"Kamen," I said
I thought of all the pictures stored at the Scoto,
pictures that were soldThey'd be safe for a
little while where they were, but in the end,
money talks and bullshit walksThat wasn't even a
man-law, it was the motherfucking American way
"Come on, Edgar," Jack said"I'll run you to your
place, then drive you back here
xiv
I won't say our trip upstairs to Little Pink was
exactly serene (I had the silver candlestick, and
carried it at port arms all the time we were
inside), but it was uneventfulThe only spirits
in the place were the agitated voices of
tiffany co jewelry the
shellsI put the drawings back in the red picnic
basketJack snagged the handles and carried it
downstairsI had his back the whole way, and
874
locked Big Pink's door behind usMuch good that
would do
While we were riding back to El Palacio, a thought
occurred to meI'd left my digital
Nikon behind and didn't want to go back for it,
but-
"Jack, do you have a Polaroid camera?"
"Sure," he saidIt's what my Dad
calls 'old but serviceable' Why?"
"When you come tomorrow, I want you to stop for
awhile on the Casey Key side of the drawbridge
Take a few Polaroids of the birds and the boats,
okay?"
"Okay
"And sneak in a couple of the drawbridge itself,
especially the lifting machinery
"Why? What do you want them for?"
"I'm going to sketch the drawbridge with the
machinery gone," I said"And I'm going to do it
when I hear the horn that means it's up to
cheap replica chanel handbag let a
boat go throughI don't think the motor and the
hydraulics will really disappear, but with luck I
can fuck it up badly enough to keep everybody off
for awhile
875
"Are you serious? You really think you can
sabotage the bridge?"
"Given how often it breaks down on its own, that
should be easy I looked again at the dark water
and thought of Tom Riley, who should have been
fixedWho had been fixed, dammit"I only wish I
could draw myself a good night's sleep
How to Draw a Picture (IX)
Look for the picture inside the pictureIt's not
always easy to see, but it's always thereAnd if
you miss it, you can miss the worldI know that
better than anyone, because when I looked at the
picture of Carson Jones and my daughter - of
Smiley and his Punkin - I thought I knew what I
was looking for and missed the truthBecause I
didn't trust him? Yes, but
chanel shopping bags that's almost funny
The truth was, I wouldn't have trusted any man who
presumed to claim my darling, my favored one, my
Ilse
I found a picture of him alone before I found the
one of them together, but I told myself I didn't
want the solo shot, that one wouldn't do me any
876
good, if I wanted to know his intentions toward my
daughter I had to touch them as a couple with my
magic hand
I was already making assumptions, you see
If I'd touched the first one, really searched the
first one - Carson Jones dressed in his Twins
shirt, Carson alone - things might have been
differentI might have sensed his essential
harmlessnessAlmost certainly would haveBut I
ignored that oneAnd I never asked myself why, if
he was a danger to her, I had then drawn her alone,
looking out at all those floating tennis balls
Because the little girl in the tennis dress was
her,
dolce gabbana handbags of courseAlmost all the girls I drew and
painted during my time on Duma Key were, even the
ones that masqueraded as Reba, or Libbit, or - in
one case - as Adriana
There was only one female exception: the red-robe
When I touched the photograph of Ilse and her
boyfriend, I had sensed death - I didn't admit it
to myself at the time, but it was trueMy missing
hand sensed death, impending like rain in clouds
877
I assumed Carson Jones meant my daughter harm, and
that was why I wanted her to stay away from him
But he was never the problemPerse wanted to make
me stop - was, I think, desperate to make me stop
once I found Libbit's old drawings and pencils -
but Carson Jones was never Perse's weaponEven
poor Tom Riley was only a stopgap, a make-do
The picture was there, but I made a wrong
assumption, and missed the truth: the death I felt
wasn't coming
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